And His Name Was Nicholas

So, the fabulosity of my day (ask me about it; I’d be happy to share) was overshadowed by Jeff’s marathon phone call (1:31:20) with Nicole.  But that’s o.k. 

Jeff texted me this morning to tell me that Nicole had emailed to set up a phone date for 7:30 p.m. when her children would be down for the night and she could give him her full attention.  She was true to her word.  At 7:35 p.m. Jeff’s cell phone rang and he and his blood sister made real contact in real-time.  I was a happy eavesdropper.

First things first.  The two swapped stories of their experience, asking each other questions and marveling at the wonder of it all.  Nicole lives north of Atlanta but her local hospital did not have a bed for the harvest so Gift of Life flew her and her mother to Mount Sinai in New York twice – once for a physical and once for the harvest.  The harvest involved five plunges into her hip.  Because of her height and weight there was some concern that there was not enough product for Jeff’s height and weight.  (Ugh!)  Afterwards, she returned to the hotel and, she said, “Your body knows what it needs.  I craved steak.”  She was not permitted to lift her one-year-old for two weeks and she reported feeling fully recovered in about two months.  (There!  I knew it could not have been easy to give up 2 liters of bone marrow.  I’m thinking that plane ride home couldn’t have been very fun.)

It was disappointing to learn that Nicole had given her consent to share contact information on the first anniversary of the transplant and yet we only got the word yesterday.  May 27^th will be the second anniversary!  I wonder if volunteers process the requests for donor/recipient contact or if there just aren’t enough staff members devoted to it.  As Jeff says, resources should be focused on those with the most need and this would not constitute vital patient care.

With their BMT war stories out of the way, their conversation turned to other things.  Nicole asked about Jeff’s emotional state throughout his ordeal and she asked about his faith.  She mentioned that her little cousin, whom we named “Luke” because his name had been redacted from Nicole’s letter, was actually Nicholas.  The short life of Nicholas started the chain of events which put Nicole in a position to help Jeff.  They talked about God’s plans, His “choreography,” and the good that can come out of life’s challenges.  Jeff mentioned the role he has found himself in at Gilda’s Club, supporting those who are beginning the transplant process. 

About 30 minutes in, Jeff said, “Oh, there are still 50 things I want to ask you.”  I whispered, “You don’t have to ask them all tonight.”  Neither one of them seemed to be at a loss for words so they talked on and on.

There was conversation about family members, car seats and childcare.  Jeff mentioned his plan to take on childcare duties a couple of days a week when Theresa goes back to work.  Nicole’s children are now 3- and 5-years old.  The older one, a boy, will start kindergarten in the fall. 

Nicole, it turns out, has good rhythm and is a good dancer though she admits she will never be on Dancing With The Stars.  She loves chocolate cake.  She loves anything sweet or cheese.  I see some similarities here.

CSI episodes featuring crimes masked by chimerism were discussed.  Jeff said, “If I commit a crime and leave behind blood and sweat, your DNA and mine would be at the crime scene.”  This is fascinating stuff, Nicole agreed. 

Jeff promised to share our blog link (warned Nicole about his quirky sense of humor) and some links to articles about his kitchen work.  Finally, they were wrapping up.  Nicole and her husband (Oh!  we don’t know his name!) plan to get up at 4:30 a.m. tomorrow for two hours of training for a mountain bike race.

What a joy this chat was for Jeff and his blood sister!  Next time, Jeff will have to remember to use the speakerphone because his hands kept cramping up from clenching the cell phone.  Perhaps their next conversation will not be quite so long.